Love is in the air and I’ve got to find a way to bottle it because I’d make a killing

I won't buy new pants because I'm afraid i'll feel uncomfortable.
I'm afraid to wear any other pairs of pants that are not the ones I normally wear because I don't want to put them on and not have them fit.

I just did it.
I faced the irrational fear and they still fit.
My mind makes up things sometimes.
Like how I pictured myself being 10 times larger then last week/month/year

I had a party hey,
I got more drunk then I should have.
I was embarrassed when I woke up.
Not during though.


We ate a whole cake
Between 5 of us, a whole cake.
I took out my childhood bible and read it to the girls because I was so drunk.
It was silly and I couldn't stop laughing but I don't like the "I was drunk last night" feeling when I wake up next to Aaron.

Aaron didn't drink
He didn't even stay downstairs with us half the time.
There was ~15 people here and Aaron went in the living room by himself on his computer.
I don't like that.
I was too drunk to get upset but It just makes me realize how different we are sometimes.
It really bothers me.

I applied for a few jobs today, one at Penny Mazda as a desk girl, one as a hostess at the Fairmont andddd one at DownEast.

I don't know why I applied for these jobs.
I need another one but I'm not sure why these.
I am hoping on the Fairmont job.

My belly is sick, I don't want to eat.
I wish I didn't feel so disgusting about myself today.

I also didn't write about how I did get the job at disney. I'm sorry journal, I'm a idiot and forgot to tell you and the...1 person that "reads" this.

I'm so excited, I've told so many people about it, I kind just want to leave it at that. :D

It’s amazing how just being in a room full of happy people can really rub off on you. When I leave gatherings, I feel giddy. I start smiling like I’m a squirrel at a baseball game where the peanut vendor trips on one of the steps in the aisle and drops all of his peanut bags on the ground, which leads to a frenzy of Cub Scouts trying to pick up all the bags because they’re really hungry from all the walking they did to find their seats but none of their parents gave them money because they’re from a pretty poor area and they don’t have a lot of disposable income to be wasting on snacks at a baseball game, even though one of the kids, Mario, had a chocolate-chip granola bar that he didn’t tell anyone about because he knew he’d have to share it with the rest of his den and he didn’t even really like the kids that much because they always called him “Super Mario Brothers” and teased him for bringing his pet squirrel to Cub Scout events even though the squirrel was pretty cool and tame and smiled whenever something out of the ordinary happened. So basically, whenever l leave and feel happy, I feel like that squirrel.f